Thirsty
I love the Psalms. When I don't have the strength to pray--or the words to say, I breathe verses like the ones above as a borrowed prayer to my Savior.
In the Psalms we meet all kinds of people in a variety of circumstances--crying out to God, praising Him, confessing their sins to Him, and seeking to worship Him in a deeper way.
Psalms 42 and 43 form a three stanza maskil (poems contemplating God's presence) focused on our yearning to experiencing God's presence. You know those days when you just want to know He's there. Psalm 42 and 43 were more than likely originally combined--making one hymn. A hymn, a poem, a prayer, expressing the worshippers desire to feel God's presence.
Have you ever been really thirsty? Actually scratch that, to get the Psalmist's feeling in this Psalm---Have you ever been really thirsty with no way to satisfy your thirst?
Probably not. We have countless sources to turn to when we're thirsty. Most of us have never experienced true and lasting thirst. But that's not the case for a lot of our world. Across the globe, 884 million people lack access to safe water supplies; approximately 1 in 8 people. And a staggering 3.5 million people die each year from water-related diseases. That's one of those problems we don't talk about enough--and here's where you can help--http://www.samaritanspurse.com/?s=turn+on+the+tap+
These people around the world know the desperation that comes from being thirsty.
So did the Psalmist.
The writer of Psalm 42 lived more than 2000 years ago--there wasn't exactly bottled water on hand. The Psalmist used thirst to demonstrate his spiritual desperation for God. He compared his thirsting for God to a deer who pants for water. Essentially, the Psalmist wrote, "I am desperate for God" I cannot survive without Him.
The Psalmist found himself in a difficult situation. Cut off from Jerusalem's temple and from the opportunity to worship God with his fellow Hebrews he cries out "When can I come and appear before God?" He found himself surrounded by people who taunted him saying "Where is your God?"
The Psalm says
"my tears have been my food" Ever been so upset you couldn't eat? Ever been so upset you couldn't get out of bed? The Psalmists inability to worship God with other believers tormented him. This was an agonizing time. He was sad--and he couldn't hide it. The mask that he had been putting on had long gone, replaced with a downcast look.
His enemies observed his distress and wrongfully assumed his God didn't exist.
Where do people get the idea that Christians are never sad? I struggled with years of depression because I didn't think I was allowed to be depressed as a follower of Christ. Believer, that is a lie from the enemy. Read this Psalm again SLOWLY and tell me this Psalmist was not depressed.
Was this Psalmist being disciplined for some sin? Had his guilt, or his people's guilt brought separation as in the days of the Babylonian exile? We don't know. All we know is that he wanted to be in the Lord's presence (at the temple) and he could not be. Something or someone was preventing him from doing so.
Now, fast forward 2000 years--we don't have to go to the temple with a goat (thank goodness) to be in God's presence, He is always with us. But we surely do go through bouts of spiritual drought. Moments when we are so ashamed that we don't want to talk to God--in fact, we want to hide. Or maybe we are angry at Him, and to be honest we just don't have anything to say to Him. Friend--that's ok. God wants your broken heart far more than your empty sacrifice.
Despair is a hopeless feeling. When we feel despair, whatever we're going through feels unfixable, unchangeable, and no one understands. Every single one of us has felt like the Psalmist did at some point--or we will. Depressed, forgotten, oppressed, ridiculed. Maybe you've lost hope about getting that job, that home, scholarship, spouse, or something else. You're not alone.
In the midst of his despair--the Psalmist found hope.
He said "I remember this as I pour out my heart" He had his memories. He could think back to times of great joy. He probably thought of one of the festivals he had attended, and how his joy had overflowed that day as he celebrated the Lord in fellowship with his family. He remembered, and in doing so--he knew there was hope.
Hoping in God doesn't mean we pretend our struggles don't exist, that doesn't work. (don't ask me how I know that...) I'm not asking you to be some delusional Christian, but instead--see your struggles as opportunities to cry out to God and cling to Him--even when your life is chaotic and out of control, even when you feel like your situation is unchangeable. Because though your life may change and it may seem things are falling apart--God does not change.
I take great comfort in knowing that God is not surprised by anything I face. He does not fall apart. He walks with me through it all. He shares my pain with me.
This is obviously not easy. But we have to rely on His promises (not our emotions) to get us through. And He promises life to the fullest. He knows what that looks like for each of us individually.
Every once in a while things come along that test our confidence in God. Times like these remind us that God's plans, not ours, prevail. He has our lives, from beginning to end, in His hands.
Take some time to remember. Think of those God moments. God is faithful. He was in the past, He will be again. And He'll quench that thirst--He's the living water.
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